Man A, Date 3

So, I did this whole no initiating contact thing, and Man A did eventually contact me again and asked for a third date… on a Saturday! YeeHa! The rules are working, right?! Well, that feeling of victory was short-lived. He somehow totally forgot his dad’s birthday and had to cancel.

Anyway, eventually we went on that third date… on a Thursday (meh). It went pretty well, and even ended in some kisses. ;-) He said he’d call, but he just texted something really short the next day. Patti Stanger says something like, "Phone calls make the man, texting make the boy, and emails make him a phantom." Good point, Patti!

After dealing with this guy, I completely appreciate a guy’s calls from the recent past. At the time, I wasn’t able to chat on the phone much and often missed calls. But now that I have more free time and have been dating different people, I totally appreciate the phone calls. It’s a little awkward when you don’t know someone too well, but once you’ve been on a few dates, it’s nice to get an old-fashioned call from a boy. ;-) By doing this, he says, “I am making an effort, and right now my attention is all yours.”

So, my conclusion with Man A is this- I’m done. Let’s face it; he’s just not that into me… or at least not for the right reasons. If a man really likes a woman, he’ll make time for her. Obstacles do not stand in a man’s way when he really likes a woman. One of my friends told me her then boyfriend, now husband made several five hour drives from the Central Valley to LA just to see her for a couple of days… just because he missed her. 

“Some people are settling down, some people are settling, and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.” And I, I refuse to settle!

So, what valuable information have I learned from this experience? Well, first I’ve been surprisingly less anxious about it than usual. It kinda sucks to be subtly rejected if that’s what you want to call it, but a part of me really doesn’t care. So, I’m learning to be less anxious; I’m getting used to the feeling; my skin's getting thicker. I think that’s a good thing.

Second, you really have to watch what men say to you. And, I know this! But I tend to want to believe them when they say they are ready to get into a relationship. Though, I know a man will say ANYTHING to make you “fall in love” with him so you’ll ultimately sleep with him. I’m finally not as quick to believe ‘em. I took this one really slow, and I believe his true colors began to show before I could make any of my own mistakes. Some red flags (which I should have ran when I seen) were: he's 30 and hasn’t been in a relationship for longer than 6 months or a year (I’m still confused about that one), has had way more sexual partners than I’d like a guy to have, and asked me to stay the night on the third date (hm… I wonder if he just wanted a snuggle buddy for the night… ahahahaha- and, no, he didn't get one, I went home).

Regardless, I’m a little bit stronger and smarter. Next up, is the first date with Man C, which will involve sailing....